The only way to get through life is to laugh your way through it. You either have to laugh or cry. I prefer to laugh. Crying gives me a headache

Thursday, 10 January 2008

Time to 'hover' ... again

“Fair is foul, and foul is fair:
Hover through the fog and filthy air.”

Apparently, you are now considered to be a 'helicopter parent' if you do what the government wants you to do and get 'positively' involved in your 'child' education!

I admit, I was always been involved in my children's education until they started university but never beyond this point. I stopped because I decided they were adult enough to fend for themselves, experience the university of life .. etc, but I always encouraged them to seek my advice if they need to and they did. Although they came more when they were younger, bit by bit, they came no more or very rarely. Wonderful! It was time for me to relax a bit, pamper myself a bit, travel a bit, have a facial, meet friends to just relax and talk silly, care free .... at last! ... and I deserve it!

Can you imagine then how I felt when my eldest told me he never got any interviews in round one of the loopy monster MTAS?! I remember that for a very brief moment, I looked him straight in the eye as if he were 10 again .. and I remember him looking back with a 'no, no mum, not me' look on his face... For a moment, he was 10 again! This was the MTAS effect that he and I will never forget! Ever!

I don't know how to describe my feelings after the MTAS blow, confused, numb .. then guilt; I felt the rejection must have been because I let go of my duties as a parent too early. To my mind, there was no other reason, so, I had to get involved again! ... Sounds familiar?

For a moment, I doubted him; he must have forgotten to write about his prizes or made a wrong statement somewhere but he assured me he didn't and I did not believe him .. :( ... He then told me that there was now a possibility he would have to leave medicine or emigrate to New Zealand or Australia .. This is when I sat by my computer for hours on end staring at the screen, frantically trying to understand the whole of medical training in one sitting! I had to learn about, to read anything and everything that had the letters M.T.A.S in any order! .. I never sleep early anyway but at that time, I hardly slept at all! ... The rest is, hopefully, .. history.

It feels a little better when you understand, even a little. Better still when you find out it wasn't your child's fault but it was some of his seniors that have messed up, those in charge of him and his generation. He was their responsibility now! But, see this picture above? This, to my mind, is what MTAS did! Rather than punishing the incompetents who devised it, it executed 30% of the creme de la creme of their generation ... My generation did that.

I have learnt my lesson, let them grow but keep an eye though you pretend you don't. Be a 'helicopter parent', or you will never forgive yourself, when our generation messes up!

Are you a 'helicopter parent?'

Time to do a bit of hovering now ... ;)

“And there, there overhead, there hung over Those thousands of white faces, those dazed eyes, There in the starless dark the poise, the hover, There with vast wings across the cancelled skies, There in the sudden blackness the black pall, Of nothing,”

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